Jan 10, 2013

Safe Space

I use theater terms a lot - terms which have come to apply to all aspects of my life. "Safe space" is a favorite. A physical, mental, and emotional space free of judgement, filled with support and understanding and trust, where honestly is valued about all else. I think of this very much as my safe space.

Sacred space - a place to connect, to breathe, to become a part of something or someone bigger and you leave your personal crap at the door. You come in as a blank slate, ready to learn, to be open, to explore.

I have a sacred space that I enjoy visiting, a short hop, skip and jump from my front door where the sounds of running water and birds whistling take away everything I was ever worried about. It's here that I can curl my fists in the sand or dip my toes in the water and feel as if the earth is surging inside of me. It is here where I become grounded.

I haven't visited in over a month, since my two jobs became exhausting and I wasn't sleeping at all, so I was shocked to come upon my sacred space and find it violated.

Because I place such importance in this place, the attack felt awkwardly personal. Horrifyingly meant for me. On top of that, the ducks who usually swim to me and beg for bread at my fingertips swam upstream immediately at the tall, dark figure I presented on the bank. They were terrified of me.

I was upset. I was angry. I seriously wanted to yell at someone or stand as a watchdog with pepper spray and a slingshot. I understand that kids tag urban areas and I've seen some really cool, beautiful street art, but this is in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of nature. This was an ugly word for an ugly reason and I hated it with every fiber of my being.

But I'll go back. I'll get used to it. I'll take it back for myself and find a way to make it part of my place. If there's ever a kid with a can of spray paint down there, however, I may just slap him/her.

4 comments:

  1. Oh that sucks, up in the mountains I always hated finding trash and stuff like that. I always picked it up as I cursed whoever dropped it. Rent yourself a small power washer and use hydrochloric acid and water on it. It will take the paint off if it isn't that old and wont hurt the water. The ducks will love you for it.

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    1. I'll have to look into that! Thank you! I definitely don't want to use anything that will contaminate the water/hurt the wildlife :)

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  2. I'm sorry some punk felt the need to violate such a beautiful, serene space. Some people seem hell bent on destroying things just for the sake of destruction. ): Reclaim it, indeed!

    Kaycee, that's an awesome idea! I bet that'll work like a charm.

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    1. Thanks, Lana, I wish I could stand guard over places like this because it does seem like people attack them for no reason. However, reclaiming them is the best we can do, and that's what I'm working on :)

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